It was the Emperor of Woodcroft, as beneficent a tyrant as you can find nowadays. I joined him in line feeling that if one cup was good then a refill would be better.
"Ho!" he said and I didn't like it. All wrong the tone. "Swilling cocktails, eh?"
I could make nothing of this. "I fail to understand you," I said. "Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't this the hour one might expect to hear, 'Good morning?"
"Out to all hours last night?" he said.
I bridled at the accusation, at least I think I bridled. I'm not sure the meaning of the word but it sounds good.
"You will have to provide more detail," I said, "and I'm sure the explanation will hold me spellbound."
"I mean you were probably out until all hours last night coming in just before dawn and waking the entire neighborhood."
"It could scarcely have been later that 2:30 a.m. when I got home and I was seeing an old friend off to the spend the holiday in the Catskills." I said it with a good deal of hauteur, if hauteur is the word I want.
"Did you have a cold shower this morning?" he asked giving me the full effect of one eye.
"I have hot water," I said.
"Did you do Swedish exercises before breakfast?"
"I'm Danish. We don't indulge in such excess. At least my grandfather was Danish but I believe that entitles me to make the same claim."
"Then why do you look like something in the chorus of a touring revue?" he said.
"Ah," I said, "that's easy enough to answer. I just need a second cup of Jah's mercy this morning."
He seemed to consider this but after a few seconds his inward gaze turned out to settle in vicinity of the lower portions of my map. His expression was one generally found on someone who has just found caterpillars in the salad.
"Ho!" he said, "what's that?"
"Ah, you mean my goatee," I said. "It's just a kitten now, of course, but in time it will grow into something that adds a bit of espieglerie and I need all the espieglerie I can get. Do you like it?"
"No, it looks like a soup stain."
"Well, I like it," I said and I was now aware that others were listening and I felt that this conversation was becoming a bit sticky. I was ready to change the subject.
"What does Ms Wonder think of it?" he asked.
"Does it matter what others think?" I said with all the hatuer I could muster remembering that other bit of hauteur.
"That's good. She doesn't like it. You'll have to shave."
"I will not shave. I'm growing this bit of facial joy for the FHI fancy dress ball in January and it's going to be with me through the holidays. J'y suis, j'y reste about sums it up for me.
He shrugged his shoulders. "Up to you, of course, if you want to be an eyesore."
"An eyesore!"
"Eyesore is what I said."
I suddenly felt the need to practice the three deep breaths. First breath, power and balance to be ready for whatever life bungs my way. Second breath to remind me that I am enough for the present circumstances. Third breath to recognize that there is more good than bad in this moment.
"Ho!" he said a third time, "what's that on your chin?"
But this is where you came in I believe.