Windows in the Sky on deck

"I've said it before and I mean it still," she said and I braced myself for the punchline, "You're the best thing to ever happen to me."


Those words came out of the mouth of Ms. Wonder and they were directed at me, of all people. Surprised? Imagine my surprise. I wanted to ask why she would say such a thing but, you know how it is, put too much focus on something and it evaporates, dissipates, fades away, and no one enjoys that.

That's how the day began and when the day gets off to a start like that, it usually means the Universe is planning a big practical joke and it's on you, my friend. Sorry, I really can only speak for myself, so let me re-phrase that and say, the jokes on me.

Later that day--it was in the early afternoon to be exact--I was returning from Southport and just outside Winnabow, I saw the full moon, plain as a picture postcard, hanging in the sky at just about the spot a window would be if the sky had windows.

You're probably thinking there's nothing unusual about seeing the moon in the open day but what if I told you that it wasn't one of those pale shades of the moon but a solid, detailed one. I could make out the Sea of Tranquility and I'm not certain but those dark spots on the lower, right edge may have been Neil Armstrong's footprints.

This is not an ordinary occurrence but I'd been expecting something like this since Wonder made that remark at the breakfast table. After all, with the auspicious convergence, if that's the term I want, something like this had to happen. Consider that in a period of only a few days we will experience the winter Olympics, Chinese New Year, Mardi Gras, and the half-off sale at the Southport CIS thrift store. 

Something had to give. The fabric of the Universe can develop a hernia when this kind of pressure builds and I knew that I was in for it now. I just hoped I'd get home before it started.

Nope!

Follow me closely on this next part because this is where you'll find the in vino veritas. Is that the term? Getting someone drunk enough to tell the truth?

Driving along Highway 87, I entered a stretch of highway where the sun was just at the perfect angle behind the trees lining the road, to create zebra streaks of sunlight and shadow. 

But wait, before I go into that, I want to say something about driving from Wilmington to Southport and if I don't tell you now, I'll forget. Most people drive down Ocean Highway to Highway 211, where they make a left turn and follow that road right smack into High Street in Southport. Bad choice. The long way to go.

What you want to do is follow Ocean Highway for only a short distance to Highway 87 and turn there. You have to look closely. Watch for the Kangaroo service station and turn just before you get to it. Southport is much closer following this route and it's a nicer drive.

I was driving that very route with those zebra stripes lining the road. Be sure you have that clear in your head; the story depends on it. As I drove into those striations (striations?), My vision alternated from light to shadow to light, in rapid succession. It was hypnotic. In a matter of seconds, my consciousness moved from the light and dark motif to a more focused awareness of on, off, on, off, on, off. Finally, I moved to an even deeper level of discrete 0, 1, 0, 1, 0, 1.

I tried to fight it, of course. Who wouldn't? But my best efforts only moved my awareness up 1 or 2 levels at a time and I couldn't completely shake it. At the dark/light level, I was Keith Richards (She’s a Rainbow was playing on SiriusXM). At the on / off level, I was the Soul Merchant (not actually a Soul Merchant but that's what some of us use as a sort of shorthand way of identifying ourselves.) 

At the deepest of zeros and ones, I ceased to exist. What I mean is that the personality known as Genome ceased to exist and I was pure consciousness. I believe this is what the Buddhists refer to as Enlightenment.

How long I continued to jump back and forth through alternate dimensions, I can't say. It seemed an eternity but probably lasted less than a minute.

Now, I'm sure that a lesser man would have been shaken to the foundations but yours truly has been through the ringer not a few times in his solar revolutions and he's developed a thick outer crust. I simply put it in the basket with all the other things that one doesn't see every day.

So what's the point, you're probably asking yourself, and I know how you feel. I ask myself the same question every day. But here's the point. You never know what Life has in store for you from one day to the next. What you expect Life to serve up is probably something bad but it's never as bad as you think. And what Life was like a few years ago wasn't really as good as you remember. Billy Joel taught me that. 

We're all just moving through the world through a series of light and dark patches. We don't move as fast as I drove but still, it works the same way. You're not really Kieth Richards and you're not a Soul Merchant. Still, you're in that personality-free state of consciousness even though you seldom realize it. 

Life will never get any better than it is right now, my friend, so the best way to deal with each day is to put everything you’ve got into it. Fierce Qigong!

 

 

Year of the Tiger

You probably will be a little surprised to hear me say it, and it's something I don't like to say, but I can think of no other way to express how I'm feeling. I'm pissed!


You know all about Princess Amy by now and you know that I try to take all her shenanigans in stride--keeping the chest out, the chin up, and the upper lip stiff. It's how my father taught me to handle the disappointments of life. 

I had come to believe that I'd reached an age of decline, an age of degeneration; an age of failing. It was a bitter pill after a full life of exercise, martial arts, constant movement. This state of despair was brought on by Princess Amy, of course, but you knew that already.

Recently, remembering to face my fears like Mump's mom taught me, I've had a change of attitude: I now see my age as one of fulfillment, one of completeness, one of attainment.

And so, dear reader, I will no longer feel lost and forgotten, I will instead face the Sewer Harpies full frontal -- no not full frontal because in that there is loss; I will instead face them obliquely and use their energies to rise above them. 

You may not remember the Harpies. It's been a while since they figured into one of my missives. When I say Sewer Harpies, I refer to the Morrigan, the three sisters who mess about with the well-laid plans of mice and men. Mabd, Macha, and Nemain are their names and heinous ranygazoo is their game.

Well, I'm tired of the same old story repeating itself like a scratched LP. I've had it. Enough is enough. I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore. 

Gird your loins for battle. Today we take on the Sewer Harpies in the first step of executing my Evil Plan for World Domination.

This year, 2022, is The Year of the Tiger in Chinese reckoning and it will be The Big Year for Genome. Stay with me. Follow this blog closely and, if you sometimes encounter the same obstacles that I face, you could benefit from some of the principles that I practice. I joke around a lot but going forward I will outline the principles more clearly. You will be amazed. 

Fierce Qigong! 



Pump The Volume

For several years now it's seemed that I'm living the same day over and over, like that Amazon TV series, Russian Doll. It's as though raindrops keep falling on my head every day. I know that Rumi tells us to welcome all who come to our door, but hey! I don’t like it! I've become filled with anxiety, depression, and hopelessness.


I realize that may all sound terribly tragic. You may think my dreams are shattered like Napoleon's must have been after all that unpleasantness at Waterloo. But please don't think it's as tragic for me as you imagine it would be for you or Napoleon. 

You see, I'm diagnosed by those who do that sort of thing with a condition that the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual calls Bipolar Type II, Mixed-State, Rapid-Cycling. All it means, of course, is that I'm often depressed, anxious, and hopeless. It's just a normal part of my life. Makes me think of the words often attributed to Frank Sinatra, "it ain't no good life, but it's my life." Like that.

On second thought, those words of Sinatra's are song lyrics, aren't they? 

No one can get used to feeling that way but one can become resigned to it and that's been my condition ever since my mother died three years ago. It wasn't so much her death that threw me into this mental state as it was the fact that I'd been her full-time caretaker for several years before her passing and when she left, I discovered that I had no purpose and had lost touch with what I wanted from life.

Well, that's sort of interesting...I've never noticed how much my life parallels Napoleon's. Except for the Emperor part.

I've struggled for those three years with trying to find a purpose and a bien ettre, as the French might say, but for some reason, I didn't do the things that I knew would help. I allowed life to get in the way and to distract me from the principles I'd learned in my mental health recovery. I believe this reluctance, or avoidance, is part of the disease.

Recently, I've seemed to become more awake and to realize that I do have a marvelous life. I have a superb partner in Ms. Wonder, who I'm sure you've met by now. She has an amazing brain, probably because she eats so much fish--salmon being the number one constituent--and you know what all those omega-3 fatty acids can do for the brain, especially the EPA and DHA.

In addition to sharing the house with Wonder, I have the cats, who have done more than you can imagine to keep the Genome upright and balanced. Perhaps the word "distracted" would be the mot juste. 

I also live near the coast now and the ocean has always been my spiritual home. I have lots of free time for running up and down Ocean's Highway and experiencing the joy of the open road. This open road motif figures strongly into my Evil Plan for World Domination--more on that as it develops. Stay tuned, please.

So if life has been improving, albeit slowly, why so glum, Genome? Ah yes, that's where the rug burn happens...Princess Amy.

Yep, that defective little tyrant in the middle of my brain works ceaselessly to point out all the nasty aspects of living in a world dominated by humans. Chances are that you live in a world dominated by humans too. It seems to be another of those pandemics that are so popular today, but one that doesn't get as much recognition as the others. 

This doesn't mean that my plight (yours too?) is hopeless. Not at all because I have a secret weapon. I can't tell you what it is here in this post because I don't want the Morrigan to know the details of my Evil Plan. But if you're interested in hearing more about it,  leave a comment below and we can discuss it over coffee.

Though I can't speak of it in concrete terms, I can give you a metaphorical hint. Remember the raindrops that keep falling? Well, I recently had me a talk with the sun, that slacker, and I mean a big talk with impressive topspin. I let him know that I didn't approve of his inaction. Sleeping on the job is how I put it to him.

Still, those raindrops keep falling and I know I'm never gonna stop them by complaining. That's where my secret weapon comes in handy. Fierce Qigong, I call it. Again, can't give you the details just yet but my childhood mantra, "I'll never eat pine needles," is the core element. 

That mantra may be new to you. I don't speak of it much. It's an inside thing that simply means crying's not for me. You see, I know that the blues they (the Morrigan) send to meet me won't defeat me. It's never long before happiness steps up to greet me. 

That's essentially all you need to know about Fierce Qigong. And to be frightfully honest, there may be a few tears involved but certainly no wailing and gnashing of teeth. Nothing like all that outer darkness ranygazoo.

In those darker moments, I simply get a steaming cup of Jah's mercy (coffee), get out onto Ocean Highway in Wind Horse with the windows down and the volume turned up to 11. That'll fix anything.

When I'm feeling better about life, I get Mumps on the phone and we clearly identify each of the problems caused by earthlings and the options our alien shepherds should consider to fix them. And when I say "fix them," I mean the problems and the earthlings, of course.

Wow! I surprised myself with this one. I actually revealed the essentials of Fierce Qigong for the first time and I went a long way to establish context for my Evil Plan. That pleases me because I always want to offer something of real value to my tribe and you are a very important tribe member.

Thank you for giving me some of your attention today. Now, before closing, I'd like to offer my sincere apologies to Hal David and B. J. Thomas.



Insider Tip

The moon, as I'm sure I don't need to tell you, is traveling around the earth at 2,288 miles an hour, and the Earth is traveling around the sun at a whopping 67,000 miles per hour, and in the process, the light of each day changes from about 9 hours on the winter solstice to around 15 hours in late June.

Up till now, I'd thought of all that as a few interesting facts. Now I see it as a significant contributor to my daily life. Let's slow it down, please! Not only is the available sunshine constantly changing, but the time I have left to enjoy this marvelous universe is evaporating at an alarming rate! It's like sand through the hourglass and so are the days of our lives. I'm not at all sure that I like where this is leading.


What I need, it seems to me is a place, and please let me know in the comments below if you think otherwise, a place where I can serenely contemplate the meaning of life, the universe, and everything.

Well, I've found that place...

On a secluded stretch of sandy shoreline, not far from Sunset Beach but far from the nearest public access point (a two-mile roundtrip), is a haven from the hectic pace of modern life, although the heavenly bodies are still up to a bit of no good.

The spot I'm talking about is a spot where time slows down. Nestled between the sand dunes you will find an unlikely whatnot. It's true; at the most remote end of Bird Island, there is a mailbox with a bench beside it.

The bench is there to allow you to relax and write your innermost thoughts, wishes, prayers, and dreams in one of the journals to be found inside the mailbox. I personally like to write small missives to loved ones who've left this planet to sleep among the stars.

Before I found the mailbox, I would stand on the beach at Ocean Isle and talk into the wind that's always rushing in from the Atlantic. But this spot on Bird Island is even better. When you've finished you simply place the journal back in the mailbox where you found it.

The Kindred Spirit Mailbox receives an untold number of visitors each year. It's featured in several local news stories and it was the subject of a CBS news special. Even one of Nicholas Sparks' novels, Every Breath, centered around Sunset Beach and the mailbox. 

Visitors come here to open their hearts, bare their souls, and take comfort from the serene surroundings provided by the undeveloped beach, the surf, and the calm horizon.

My innermost thought while at the beach was that no matter how old I am, my whole life is always ahead of me. Curious how that happens, don't you think? Do you suppose it's a random coincidence or is there meaning in it? No matter, the point I'm getting at is that it's important to get as much from each day as possible and for me, that means making happy memories.

If you're looking for a reliable way to make those memories, I've found that it helps to do some little something to make someone else's day a little brighter. When I remember to do that, my skies become bluer and my days are brighter--brighter inside that is. I think you'll find nothing more valuable in this life or the next.

But I'm straying from the path, as I often do, so let's get back on it and come to our happy ending. But before we do that, let me interject that coffee and music help to make happy memories even happier. If you're looking for coffee before or after the mailbox, look no further than Beach House Cafe on the mainland side of Sunset Beach. 

If you need music...first of all why have to journeyed into the wild without music? Never be without music, my friend. Remember, music will get you through times of no coffee, but coffee will never get you through times of no music. I suggest you read my post titled, Magic in the Music, but not now--finish this post first.

Insider Tip:

The serene walk from the last public access on Sunset Beach to Bird Island and the Kindred Spirit Mailbox is a two miles roundtrip and will give you time to reconnect with self and spirit. Bicycles are available for rent at Sunset Beach but, believe me, riding a bike in beach sand is everything you imagine it to be.






On the Road

"Someday I will find the right words and they will be simple."

"The only truth is music." 

~~ Jack Kerouac

I've never told this story before and after you read it, you'll know why it's remained untold until now. I'm telling it now only because I've just finished reading Jack Kerouac's On The Road, considered by many to be the best of American travel writing, and a book that made Kerouac an icon of the Beat Generation.



In his book, Kerouac writes, "I have lots of things to teach you now... concerning the message that was transmitted to me under a pine tree in North Carolina on a cold winter moonlit night. It said that Nothing Ever Happened, so don't worry. It's all like a dream."

I finished the book in my bedroom in North Carolina on a cold winter moonlit night near the window that looks out on a pine tree. Close enough to Kerouac's description to cause me to meditate on the words, "It's all like a dream."

You see, my own life seems very much dream-like. Kerouac described the feeling with these words: "The air was soft, the stars so fine, the promise of every cobbled alley so great, that I thought I was in a dream."

That's much the way I often feel and it makes me wonder if all the things I think I remember could have actually happened. Perhaps they are only a dream. According to Jack, nothing ever happened, so no need to even ask the question according to him.

As I mused on this subject, there on that cold winter moonlit night, I remembered an event from my childhood. That in itself isn't remarkable; I often remember childhood landmarks or dreams.  This one involved my old childhood pal who featured so strongly in the post titled, "Beans Up the Nose." If you haven't read it then you'll want to do just that but only after finishing this one, please.

That pal and I as I'm sure you remember had sworn an oath of loyalty, just as the knights of the Round Table, to a life-long search for the Holy Grail, or specifically, to following our own path and none other, just as the knights in their search for the grail. It was the same for Kerouac in On the Road.

Kerouac is recognized for his style of spontaneous prose, or so I'm told. And this best bud of mine and I were recognized if we were recognized at all, for our spontaneous compulsion to explore strange new worlds and to boldly go where we'd not gone before and to do so by forging new paths. 

Forgive my mixing thematic elements; I've jumped from Camelot to Star Trek. It's another of the traits, or faults, to be compared with Kerouac. I want to stop, really I do, but it's a struggle and I'm sure Jack struggled with too. If you have any suggestions that might help, please leave them in the comments below.

Our spontaneous compulsion mentioned above was the reason for our being out on a quiet winter morning when snow covered the ground gently and was not deep, and the prolonged cold spell had frozen the surface of the lake near Armstrong Bridge. We were suited up in woolen armor and were seeking what opportunities might be in store for a couple of adventurous boys. 

What fun it was to walk out onto the ice, far from shore, and see that familiar lakeside from a different vantage point. At just the right distance from shore, where the ice was just the right thickness, our body weight was just the right amount to cause a curvature in the surface of the ice--much like gravity causing the space-time continuum to bend--yeah like that.

At the point where all those just-rights converged, there was a loud report, and I don't mean a report as in a book review; I mean a big bang like a gunshot. We immediately stopped and stared at each other with a look that was not complete terror but with an expression that shouted a silent, "Mama!"

It's amazing how quickly the emotions change when the saber-toothed doesn't immediately leap out and eat you. In a second after that first report, we were no longer afraid but ecstatic. We were giddy with excitement as we stomped the ice harder and harder to hear the reverb of the crack, bang, boom echoing through the hills.

The loud noises, which is dope to teenaged boys, were quickly accompanied by spider-webs of shallow cracks that radiated from our spot on the ice toward the shoreline. What fun! Stomp! Stomp! Whoa!

Immediately following that last stomp, which my buddy made by leaping as high as his bundled body would allow, and coming down with both feet, there came a great surprise. The saber-toothed unexpectedly appeared and leaped. Metaphorically, of course! Not an actual tiger, you understand, but something just as frightening.

In short, my old pal disappeared beneath the surface, leaving a gaping hole and only his bogan (a type of hat commonly worn back in the day) floating on the surface to mark where he'd been moments before. Seconds later, he appeared flailing around and blaming me for the unfortunate event. 

By the way, if all that was just a dream, then it must have been a lucid one because I remember that bogan floating on the water like it was yesterday. Despite the predicament, I must admit that I didn't half laugh!

Now it was a serious situation, as I'm sure you agree. My friend would not have gotten out of that hole in the ice if he'd been alone. But he wasn't alone was he? I was Gallahad to his Gawain and he soon enough stood shivering on the surface of the ice. Did I mention that his Great Aunt lived about 100 yards from the lake? We ran all the way and he found salvation wrapped in a blanket in front of the fireplace in his aunt's living room. She promised not to tell his mother, which was another bit of cake for everyone concerned.

I wasn't aware at the time, that Kerouac had provided a neat summary for the day when he said, "There's nothing to be afraid of and nothing to be glad about.... Because in the end, you won't remember the time you spent working in the office or mowing your lawn." And then he delivered the punchline, "So climb that goddamn mountain!"

With the current subject, we might say, Walk that frozen lake!

Even though I'd not yet read On the Road at the time my friend was drying the tissues in front of the fireplace and his great aunt had agreed not to tell his mom, I still had a vague awareness that I should have followed his lead. That's right! Consider that if I too had walked the lake and fallen below the surface, I would have found salvation in front of that same fire and my mother would never have known of the affair. Just think what a story that would be!

What, you're probably asking, would the end be with none around to pull us both out of the freezing water. I don't know the answer. None of us do really but Jack reminded us that, "It all ends in tears anyway."

When at last I put the book down, after reading the last paragraph on the last page, the first of his words to come floating up from the darkness of my mind were, "My whole wretched life swam before my weary eyes, and I realized no matter what you do it's bound to be a waste of time in the end and you might as well go mad."

I don't know why those words intrigued me so. Not because they're uplifting, right? No, not inspiring but surely something to think about. Something to consider. You see, in my case, I've already gone mad so there's no reason not to climb that goddamn mountain. Follow me closely here because I've jumped the rails again. I'm not talking about frozen lakes but about my Evil Plan to Dominate the World.

And right about now, you're probably saying to yourself that this entire post was merely my way of announcing that I'm back to work on the Evil Plan. And you're right. And why not? What's to lose? I'm going to let you answer that because I have work to do elsewhere and time's a'wasting. So in closing, I'll list a few more of the Kerouac quotes that seemed to speak to me in a personal way. That way you can piece it all together for yourself. Or not.

"There was nowhere to go but everywhere, so just keep on rolling under the stars." 

"Nothing behind me, everything ahead of me, as is ever so on the road." 

"Happiness consists in realizing it is all a great strange dream."